Gratitude and Expectations

Have you ever thought about how often we treat the good people in our lives worse than we treat the ones who are crappy to us?? I was thinking about that the other day and I came to the conclusion, in my life it's all about expectations versus gratitude. I have low expectations for the people who aren't  very nice, helpful, or cooperative. When they are rude, unhelpful, cruel etc. they don't disappoint me. Therefore I don't ever expect anything more.

        On the other hand the people in my life who are loving and giving sometimes do disappoint me. When they aren't always cheerful, helpful, kind, and doing what I expect they should be, I am disappointed. Then I  am mad because they didn't do what I expected. 

      What if I could turn it around and just be grateful to the good people in my life. Not put expectations on them. Just appreciate them. Replace the expectations with gratitude and my world would be a better place. 

      I find it especially easy to start expecting people who have been in my life a while  to be a certain way. They have always been there doing the same things each day and the little things that used to put a smile on my face now go unnoticed unless they don't do them. Then I am upset. This year for Christmas I am giving my self a gift. I am going to try and throw out the expectations for everyone in my life and replace it with gratitude.  Look for the small things my loved ones do for me everyday. I have a feeling if I replace expectation with gratitude I will have a much better 2014. What present are you giving yourself this year?

   

Hey you!!!

A couple weeks ago on a warm Saturday I took Nixon over to the farm while Grandpa and Uncle Matt were building a chicken coop. They were using a tractor with a bucket as a ladder. Nixon being a tractor lover climbed right up on it and began to push and pull every knob, lever, and gearshift he could find in an attempt to start that tractor. When his attempts didn't work he began calling to Grandpa to let him know his tractor was broke. The conversation went something like this .... Grandpa. What?? It's broke. What's broke ?? Tractors broke. Oh yeah it won't start for ya will it. Grandpa. What ?? It's broke. What?? It's broke. Oh yea I guess it is. All while Grandpa was still trying to work on the chicken coop. This went on for a while but Grandpa got into a more technical part of the coop and his mind became absorbed by what he was doing. Then the conversation went something like this. Grandpa. Grandpa it's broke. Grandpa. Grandpa. Grandpa it's broke. It's broke. Grandpa. HEY YOU!! Grandpa stopped working and payed attention again. It made me wonder how often do we get so busy that the important people need to yell HEY YOU to get our attention. I see young moms on their smartphones or tablets Pintresting or Facebooking while their kid is trying everything to get their attention. At the restaurant having a quiet romantic dinner are you gazing into your loved one 's eyes or into your smartphone. Are you so busy with your life that the people around you are begging for attention and you don't even notice. How often in the evenings do you look around and someone is on the computer, someone is texting, someone is watching TV and YouTube on their IPad.  When did we stop paying attention to each other. All the new technology makes our lives easier. But it also makes it easier to become totally detached from what is happening all around us. This Christmas give your friends and family the gift of you. All of you. Not just the top of your head as you look down at the device in your hand. Talk to them and look at them at the same time. Pay attention to the people around you that might be crying out for your attention. See if you can do some projects instead of just pinning them. Talk to your friends about what's going on in your lives rather than just Facebooking about it. You just might rediscover the art of conversation. 

Of life, and trials, and flying pigs(skins)

People have asked me what is the flying pig, and why the flying pig. I have collected pigs for a long time. I have loved pigs ever since I was a little girl. After my husband died the flying pig became  symbol of hope to me. I had a picture of a little pig joyfully jumping off the end of a dock into the water. The picture depicts him mid flight, showing that with enough try a pig can fly. This became my  daily mantra. If the pig could fly then so could I. It got me through some rough times and has kept me going when I want to give up. I started my flying pig boutique as a way to sell a few of the things I make , but also to hopefully inspire other people to become flying pigs and spread their wings. I like to crochet tiny pigs and give them to people who inspire me in some way. I also sell them along with a certificate of award, and my version of the flying pigs story.
      Last night I had the privilege of watching my nephews senior night at the football game, back at my old school. I love going to the West Side games and even more when they win. But it got me thinking how life resembles a football game and we are the players. Although they beat the other team by a good long ways, there was still struggles going on. Sometimes it was one player against another, and sometimes it was a dog pile, but they just kept getting up. So it is in life, sometimes I have one small trial and sometimes they dog pile me. At this point I can get up or lay there. If I choose to just lay there it's game over for me. My nephew was playing with an injury from a previous game and although he wasn't on the field as much as usual, every time he went in he did so with enthusiasm and spirit. He never held back and he gave it his best. I was so proud to be part of his cheering section. I wondered to myself when I am hurt do I jump right back up and do my best or do I sit on the bench and nurse my injured self. Do I wallow in self-pity or do I push through the pain so that I can play in that game. Do I hold back a part of me so I won't get hurt or do I give up and walk back to the dressing room with my head hanging low, or do I run out on that field like I own the place and say..bring it on!!! I am ready for what ever you throw at me!! 
      The seniors on that team have been part of three in a row years of district sweeps. They have been injured , beat up, and knocked down a lot, but they have also felt the pride of walking off the field as winners, head held high and shoulders straight.      The very first game they played this year they lost. Their team lost a lot of graduating seniors last year, and people were not expecting them to do big things, they could have given up but they didn't they went on to win 7 games straight.
   And so it is in life, if we give up, stay down or let our own self-pity get us down we will never know the things we can accomplish. So don't be afraid to to grab the bull by it's horns wrestle it down and kick it's bully butt.
  Stay strong my piggy friends, spread those wings and fly no matter how tiny they may be. It's only through exercising them that they will grow.

Time to fly

I've decided to give this blogging thing another try. I think that maybe my facebook friends don't want to read my sometimes long posts and I need somewhere to share my thoughts so they will quit running around in my head. This blog is my way of sharing my hope, faith, humor and sometimes even my wiseness. I am not even sure that is a word.
       This last couple of weeks have really had me thinking about life and death and all things in between those two. With the 9th anniversary of my husband's death being the same day that his father decided to leave this earth, it was very emotional, then followed by my sweet little grandaughter Ella's first birthday, which was also a very emotional time. She is adopted and we waited for her for a very long time, although now she's here it doesn't seem that long.
      I have been thinking a lot about a certain conversation I had with a younger person a while ago. They have their whole life planned out for the next 50 or so years. Now I think it's wise to plan, but they are not going to let anything set them off this course. Hmmm well I once had plan too. It did not include being a widow with two young kids at the age of 41. It didn't include hitting my head and getting diagnosed with a TBI, it didn't include my daughter getting pregnant in her senior year, it didn't include me living back on a farm, and it surely didn't include me learning how to spin wool into yarn, and learning to crochet.  Well although my husband dying was tragic, horrible, terrible and a lot of other things, I have grown, learned, became closer to my children, and been able to meet and marry another wonderful man who takes care of me and spoils me. When I hit my head I was told I needed to start using my brain more because when you're old you loose brain cells anyway so your brain doesn't heal itself like it would when you are younger. It needed exercise and I got tired of crossword puzzles so I looked for a new hobby. Having just acquired a couple of alpacas I decided that learning to spin wool would be a great idea, and that lead my to think that I better have something to do with the yarn that I made. Having been taught at a young age how to crochet by my grandma, I decided to try again. As  young child I had such a hard time sitting still let alone trying to concentrate on making little stitches with little yarn I probably drove my grandma crazy, but as a result of the brain injury they tested me for ADHD--I have it--big surprise:) anyway with the medication that I have to take for my brain I have found out I can sit and even make crochet stitches, and I love it. My family is now adorned with all types of crocheted things. Living on a farm due to my marrying a farmer, which I was never going to do, has brought me so much joy, and a sense of calm that I only feel when I am around my small petting zoo full of fabulous little creatures. My daughter getting pregnant has added the most fabulous little boy to our family, who I tend while she works and I love it. It has caused some stress and has been hard at times but more of a blessing than anything.
   So back to my friend, they insist that nothing is going to deter them from their plan. I feel sorry for them, they are going to miss out on some of the best parts of life, they are totally devastated when something knocks them off course because it is not what they planned. I have learned through life that their are three important things you are gonna need to make it in this world. Flexibility, humor, and hope. Make your plans and then go out and live your life as it comes to you.
    That's what the flying pig is all about. Having the faith and hope to spread your wings however tiny and to soar against all odds. When someone doubts you show them what you can do, and when you get knocked off course, don't be afraid to laugh at yourself, then go out and blaze a new path. You never know what fabulous surprise might be waiting for you around the next corner.
Spread your piggy wings and fly!!!!!